Anxiety & Shame Are Killing Your Marriage—Here’s How to Take Back Control
Anxiety and shame didn’t come with your marriage—they were there long before.
They’ve been circling you like buzzards, waiting for their moment.
They were there when your dad left and you had to become the “man of the house” too soon.
They were there when you struggled to focus at home but could hyper-fixate on making money.
They were there when you pushed for perfection so hard that it made you sick.
🔥 These are the bringers of burnout, divorce, and depression.
Step 1: Stop Looking to Her for Validation
You thought if you worked hard enough, provided enough, and stayed “stable,” she would recognize you.
But the more you seek her approval, the less interested she is.
Now, you’re hearing things like:
❌ “I need space.”
❌ “I love you, but I’m not in love with you.”
❌ “You need to change—you’re the problem in our marriage.”
And it feels suffocating—like no matter what you do, you’re losing control.
But here’s the brutal truth: she’s right.
Not in the way you think—not because you’re unworthy, weak, or unfixable.
But because she doesn’t want a man who looks to her for emotional validation.
She doesn’t want a man who makes her his center.
She doesn’t want to be your mother.
What does she want?
👉 A man who can lead.
Step 2: Face the Roots of Your Anxiety & Shame
This isn’t just about your marriage.
It’s about the childhood wounds that still run your life.
✅ Your fear of abandonment turned into codependency and people-pleasing.
✅ Your need for approval turned into making her your emotional center.
✅ Your desire for perfection turned into chronic burnout and emotional exhaustion.
And the more you try to get her approval, the more she pulls away.
You want to be strong, grounded, and confident, but your subconscious is still wired to avoid rejection at all costs.
Until you fix this, no amount of money, success, or effort will make her respect you.
Step 3: Take Back Your Power & Lead the Relationship
You cannot control her.
You cannot force her to change.
What you can control?
🔥 Your energy.
🔥 Your mindset.
🔥 Your leadership.
You must rewire the patterns that keep you trapped in Nice Guy Syndrome, anxious attachment, and codependency.
That means:
✔ Stop chasing validation.
✔ Detach from the need for her approval.
✔ Become emotionally solid—no matter how she reacts.
This isn’t just about saving your marriage.
This is about becoming the man you were meant to be.
Your Next Steps (Take Action Now)
📩 Step 1: Download the Free PDF
Get my exact three-step plan for men who want to fix their codependency, rebuild trust, and reclaim their leadership. → Click here
📅 Step 2: Book a 1:1 Call
If you’re ready for deep, personalized coaching, let’s map out a plan together. → Schedule a call here
🔥 Step 3: Fix Your Codependency Fast
If you’re serious about transformation, my fast-track course will get you unstuck. → Get the course here
Anxiety and Shame ☠️
Are the two circling buzzards of your marriage. They didn’t come with your marriage. They’ve been following you around since your dad left home when you were a kid.
They were there when you had to become the man of the house way too young.
They were there when you couldn’t stay on task with important things at home and then hyper-fixated on your business, making money, and getting your deals done.
They are there when you strive for so much perfection that it makes you feel sick. They are the bringers of burnout, divorce, and depression.
You tried talking to her to fix them. You looked too much to her for approval, and she pushed you away more. You wanted nothing more than recognition for all your hard work, how well you’ve provided for her, and been the “stable one.” But the more you try to get it from your wife, the less interested she is.
Then you notice the shame and anxiety feel stronger than ever. You’re starting to see how your childhood fear of abandonment is manifesting into codependency, need for approval, people-pleasing, and an addiction to making her your emotional center… and the more you do that, the more she pushes you away.
Now she’s saying things like:
- I need space.
- I love you, but I’m not in love with you.
- You need to change—you’re the problem in our marriage.
In a way, she’s right. She needs you to lead her, not look to her for maternal reassurance. She needs your masculine energy, instead of you feeling like an endless vacuum for her approval.
I know she needs to clean her side of the street too. I know she can feel unhinged and chaotic, but we’ll talk about that later. For now, deal with what you can control: **you**.
Since 2010, I’ve been helping men heal the childhood roots of anxious attachment, codependency, Nice Guy Syndrome, and relationship addiction. I work with CEOs, founders, business owners, and other senior-level, highly educated men who have it all at work and chaos at home.
Drop “me” in the IG comments or DM, and I’ll send you my free 9-page PDF detailing exactly how I help men reclaim their power, break these toxic patterns, and create the marriage they’ve always wanted.
